these lizard/cockroach traps really do work. i had set out a trap to attempt to get rid of an uninvited houseguest, a lizard that my wife had nicknamed 'lizzie'.

after two days, my first task upon waking up in the morning was to comfort my wife, who had been wandering around the kitchen. according to her, she had thought to herself : "wouldn't it be funny if there was a lizard's tail sticking out of the trap."

she looked down and, lo and behold, there was a lizard's tail sticking out of the trap. and she was standing on it.


the tail is in the top right corner of the picture, for those of you who don't enjoy playing 'where's wally'.


apologies, not a great photo. i think my hands were trembling uncontrollably in the fear that she was playing dead, would free herself with a convulsive jerk, and leap upon me with fangs barred (lizzie, not my wife). poor lizzie, she never even made it to the bait in the centre. if you were stuck on a piece of sticky paper waiting to die, it would be nice if you could munch on bait in the meantime, to make the wait less tedious. a last supper, of sorts. i wonder if the bait is poisoned.

one of the drawbacks of marriage - you have to dispose of immobilized lizards. not something i particularly enjoy doing, for, although i am blessed with numerous and varied talents, i will admit freely that i am a coward. in the words of jack handy (whom i personally think is the most brilliant man to ever walk the face of this earth),

"if you define cowardice as running away at the first sign of danger, screaming and tripping and begging for mercy, then yes, mr. brave man, i guess i am a coward."

but then you breathe in deep and get perspective. and balance it with the benefits of marriage. like having someone to do the dirty dishes; the laundry and ironing. for free. then all of a sudden throwing lizards in the dustbin doesn't seem quite so bad.